The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty

The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty was released in 1971, we've all seen the subsequent film released in 1973, you might have read the book but an altogether different experience is guaranteed to scare the pants off you with the audiobook. Narrated by the author who won an Oscar for best writing/screenplay based on material from another medium for the Exorcist and I have to say this is easily the best production and performance from any audiobook that I've listened to.

Powerfully gripping, a story that is truly frightening with characters that are riveting and completely absorbing. Every character was perfectly fleshed out, I both liked and likened the detective William Kinderman to Peter Falks Colombo always that one more question or insight. Forever bordering on annoying and continually grasping at straws but really enjoyable, the film doesn’t show any of that as well as the book.

Damien Karras was superb, a compelling character that the film could never quite portray adequately enough and then the impact of Father Lankester Merrin and the attempted exorcism. One word fanfuckingtastic. Merrin has short page time but he is a significant presence all the same. Regan, lovely and sweet, for a short time anyway, until she starts to manifest different personalities and becomes quite the opposite of lovely and sweet. Vomiting, cursing and using a religious cross for a purpose altogether different to what it was intended for.

This is demon possession horror and its done both horrifically well and with immense impact. From the different impersonations by the demon to the relationships of the characters entwined in the story, everything is perfect. Obviously this has been reviewed to death so this is more a profession of adoration for a masterpiece than a review and I really need to watch the film again it feels way to long since I last watched it. *Just watched it and rightly justified as one of the best horror films of all time but the book, well the book is even better, simple as that*.

Absolutely nothing compares to this and it’s without doubt the best and easily my favourite horror story, in fact any bloody story. I rate it that highly and the audio narration by the author adds a level that's nigh on impossible to surpass in the realms of horror and audiobooks. Intense just doesn't seem to cover it. If it's been a good while since you last delved into The Exorcist then it might be time for a revisit.

And I think another star is needed.

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Apeshit by Carlton Mellick III

Apeshit by Carlton Mellick III
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

What the fuck can I say about Apeshit, well pretty often, almost as easy as the flip of a coin, the story went from flat-out batshit crazy to head shaking incredulous wonder.

We have six college kids taking off for a break to a country retreat, one of the kids grandfather has died and left him the cabin. So that’s where they are heading. There's plenty of weirdness in this story, on the way up the perilous mountain road to the cabin they run past an area full of dead animals and a random dead bloke at the side of the road. The animal apocalypse it seems but that’s pretty tame as expectations should go.

Now these aren't your average college kids, one's a tattooed cheerleader sporting a mohican who happens to be in a relationship with two of the guys. She spends the majority of the book running round with her intestines hanging out, performing the odd lasso trick. There's a couple who don't have sex and it might be said, get up to some pretty funny sexual activities. That's not funny haha, that's fucked up funny. One guy has had an alleged urinary tract infection for a number of months that's prevented him taking part in the shagging Olympics going down but oh! fucking no, stupid boy, he's had an altogether different operation that... yeah you'd have to read it.

They arrive at the cabin and its total madness, total fucked up mayhem and yes the review does completely deserve this many expletives, there's mutants and a heap load of freakish, rifuckingdiculously queer and downright outlandish shit going on.

Did I enjoy it? I don't think I'll ever be able to answer that, it felt weird and it’s written with an extremely simplistic writing style. This author is as nutty as a dive bomb into a swimming pool full of peanuts and he certainly entertains but I'll be forever torn between genius and padded cell.

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The Girl on the Train

The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Out of work and gripped by a serious drinking problem, Rachel still rides the train to London and back every day, fantasizing about a couple she sees living near a house that used to be hers. When the female half of the couple goes missing, Rachel is convinced she knows the answer. But who would believe a drunk?

Every once in a while, a book is seriously hyped and I keep it at arm's length for as long as a I can. Sometimes, I regret it, like with The Martian or Gone Girl. The Girl on the Train was similarly hyped. How could I resist for long?

Well, as much as The Girl on the Train is hyped as the next Gone Girl, it ain't no Gone Girl. Here are my thoughts.

The Girl on the Train is told by three viewpoint characters: Rachel, the alcoholic jobless divorcee, Anna, Rachel's ex-husband's new wife, and Megan, the female half of the couple Rachel is entranced by. None of them are good people but I wouldn't put them in the league of Amy of Gone Girl fame. They're all varying degrees of messed up.

Rachel's drunken detective playing is entertaining but also sad. She just can't let go of Tom and is determined to help Megan's husband figure out what happened to her.

While I think Paula Hawkins does a great job of juggling three viewpoint characters and serving up plate after plate of deep-fried red herring, it still feels like an attempt to cash in on the Gone Girl hype to me. Gone is the unreliable narrator. Unfortunately, she got the less than completely sympathetic leads part right. However, it was pity I felt rather than revulsion.

As long as you aren't expecting the second coming of Gone Girl, The Girl on the Train is a gripping thriller. I wolfed it down in near record time. There was just a little something missing. 3.5 out of 5 stars.

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