Thursday, May 12, 2016

Naruto 72: Uzumaki Naruto!

Naruto, Vol. 72: Uzumaki Naruto!! (Naruto, #72)Naruto, Vol. 72: Uzumaki Naruto!! by Masashi Kishimoto
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Series and book spoilers ahead. You've just been warned

So I love Naruto. I love the series, I love the character, and I've loved the video games (I played and owned many of them over the years.) I never wrote reviews for the majority of the series and the idea of writing 72 reviews seems daunting. So instead I wrote a review for book one and now I'm writing a review/ode to the series for book 72.

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I've read Naruto from the beginning, the start of Team 7, the fight with Zabuza and Haku, the Chunnin Exams, and the multitude of other amazing moments. I loved it the teams, Konoha, the jutsu I still would've love to see someone call out the wrong jutsu on purpose to surprise the enemy, and the world from the start.

I was there for the rasengans...

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...and yes there were a lot.

I loved the techniques like Sage Mode, Tailed Beast Mode, and the Eight Gates. Sage Mode is still my favorite.

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I watched Naruto grow from a goofy kid with pervy jutsu to the savior of the shinobi world and I loved every bit of it.

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If Kishimoto ever decides to make another full series on the world of Naruto then I'll absolutely read it. So farewell Naruto, it's been a wild ride.

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Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Hex by: Thomas Olde Heuvelt

HEXHEX by Thomas Olde Heuvelt
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I am not huge on horror novels or novellas, the former because I just am not a fan of the genre and the later due to me reading really fast and not wanting to spend cash on something that I will read in a day. That being said, this year I have read more horror and more novellas than I have ever since probably high school, and I am an old, old, ancient man.


Hex....freaked me the hell out, I am probably off horror for the rest of this year. It is an exceptionally well written book in my opinion, and it is not a in your face horror tale, but it sneaks around you and scares you from multiple angles and makes you cringe and cry like the little bitch you are. (I'm not scared..honest)

If you like horror, you'll eat this up and I have no problem recommending it, me? I am off horror for a while (I'm notttttttt fucking scared!) whimper..


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Nightglass (Pathfinder Tales) by: Liane Mercel

Nightglass (Pathfinder Tales)Nightglass by Liane Merciel
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I am a weird cat, I am one of these dudes who although I have never played a game of Dungeons & Dragons, Pathfinder, Shadowrun, etc and so on, I totally would sit down and read the guides to the games. The worlds interest me to no end, the background, characters and lore I eat with a spoon even if I never touch the games.

A few weeks ago, I got the pathfinder adventure game app for my tablet, and lo and behold, that got me into the game and I stumbled upon at the local thrift store a series of the Pathfinder tales books, this being the first one I read.

I was impressed, it wasn't just a super tale, but it was solid, kind of dark, fun, well told fantasy. The main character I liked, sort of a good guy molded in a bad place. Even though I could tell where the tale was going for the most part, I did NOT mind the ride.

So, I have read three of my stash so far, and if you ever feel the desire to read some solid fantasy, Nightglass and Nightblade (basically the next book with the main character) is a good time.



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Monday, May 9, 2016

No Hearts Warmed Here

The Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas TerrorThe Stupidest Angel: A Heartwarming Tale of Christmas Terror by Christopher Moore
Reviewed by Jason Koivu
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Kitchen sink wackiness and a troop of tropes parade through a book not half as hilarious as I hoped.

In a barely fictional California coastal town - that's about two hours from where I live and, to the writer's credit, I feel pretty sure I've been there - the locals of a sleepy tourist town prepare for Christmas. A handful of middle-aged divorcees, lonesome loners, curmudgeons, and crazies bitch and bumble their way through a hair-(and more)-raising couple days. A celestial visitor scares the bejesus out of the local constable, who's got his hands full sorting out a town's worth of mischief and mayhem.

Do all of Christopher Moore's books include angels and a undercurrent of Christianity? I've only read two Moores so far, but I'm two for two on the jesus and god shit. I should probably look for titles without "gospel" and "angel" in them.

This isn't as funny as I'd hoped. In fact, neither of his books lived up to the hype I built up after reading a few reviews. I got a snort or two out of The Stupidest Angel, but generally I find his humor to be dated and easy, as in, he goes for the easy gag. There were a few insightful satirical jabs, but not enough to make me feel it was worth the read.

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Sunday, May 8, 2016

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream

I Have No Mouth and I Must ScreamI Have No Mouth and I Must Scream by Harlan Ellison
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

In the interest of finally reading something written by Harlan Ellison and also to teach myself to better write short stories, I decided to take this short story collection on.

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream: The title story of the collection is the tale of a mad AI computer that has been torturing the last five humans alive for untold centuries for its own amusement. This was a pretty chilling tale of a hellish future. I loved the surprising ending.

Big Sam was My Friend: This is the story of a teleporting interplanetary circus performer looking for his lost love. After the first tale, I was surprised to find it a somewhat sweet tale.

Eyes of Dust: In a world where physical beauty is the norm, the two flawed people have a kid together who is doomed from the start. Horrifying and not that far-fetched.

World of the Myth: A ship crashes on a far-off world and the three crew members encounter a hivemind of ant-like creatures. Horror ensues. This one was another chilling tale in which the worst horror comes from within.

Lonely Ache: A lady's man think's there's a monster living in his apartment. This was a dark tale and yet another horror story where the worst horror comes from inside.

Delusion for a Dragon Slayer: A guy gets hit with a wrecking ball and a lot of weird shit I had trouble sorting out happens. Not a fan of this story.

Pretty Maggie Moneyeyes: A down and out gambler finds a slot machine that keeps hitting the jackpot for him. This one reminded me of a Twilight Zone episode, complete with twist ending.

My first Harlan Ellison experience was a good one. Some of the stories seem like products of the time they were written, though, in regard to the way women and minorities were portrayed. Ellison sure knew how to weave a short story. Four out of five stars.

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Friday, May 6, 2016

Dead Ringer



Heidi Belleau & Sam Schooler
Riptide Publishing
4 out of 5 stars
Reviewed by Nancy



Summary



Brandon Ringer has a dead man’s face. His grandfather, silver-screen heartthrob James Ringer, died tragically at twenty-one, and Brandon looks exactly like him. But that’s where the resemblance ends. Brandon is unknown, unemployed, and up to his ears in bills after inheriting his grandparents’ Hollywood mansion. He refuses to sell it—it’s his last connection to his grandmother—so to raise the cash he needs, he joins a celebrity look-alike escort agency.

Percy Charles is chronically ill, isolated, and lonely. His only company is his meddlesome caregiver and his collection of James Ringer memorabilia. When he finds “Jim Ringer” on Hollywood Doubles’ website, he books an appointment, hoping to meet someone who shares his passion for his idol.

Brandon? Not that person.

But despite their differences, they connect, and Percy’s fanboy love for James shows Brandon a side of his grandfather he never knew. Soon they want time together off the clock, but Percy is losing his battle for independence, and Brandon feels trapped in James’s long shadow. Their struggle to love each other is the stuff of classic Hollywood. Too bad Brandon knows how those stories end.




My Review



After reading the excellent Bump in the Night, I was excited to read another collaboration by Heidi Belleau and Sam Schooler.

Rent boy stories are one of my guilty pleasures, but Dead Ringer is really so much more. Even though the ending was predictable, the characters popped right off the page, the plot was captivating, and the characters’ struggles and joys were explored with a great deal of thoughtfulness and sensitivity.

After his grandmother’s death, Brandon Ringer inherits her mansion, along with a basement full of his famous grandfather’s memorabilia that he’s uncomfortable with and wants to sell. Selling all this stuff would help Brandon with his financial troubles and enable him to maintain the huge house, but he has conflicting feelings and an as yet unexplored connection with his grandfather.

The stories he knows about his grandfather, passed along by other family members, are less than positive. Brandon is resentful towards him for the shabby way he treated his grandmother, but is forever stuck with his likeness.

So rather than selling James Ringer’s precious possessions, Brandon decides to make money in a way he’s familiar with. Exploiting his grandfather’s fame and good looks, he joins an escort service called Hollywood Doubles. Brandon learns early on that physical similarities are not enough to convince his clients that he is an authentic double. Thanks to a supportive boss (a Marilyn Monroe double), Brandon eventually learns to embrace his role while retaining his identity and believing in himself. While learning all he can about his grandfather’s life from studying, through his clients, and most importantly, from his newfound relationship with Percy, a young man suffering from juvenile arthritis and dependent on a cruel nurse and his distant parents, as well as being a rabid fan of James Ringer, Brandon discovers buried truths and complexities about his character that show him in a different light.

I felt the portrayal of Percy’s disability was accurate and respectful, as well as the adjustments Brandon and Percy had to make to ensure his comfort while making love. I appreciate that the authors didn’t make Percy a victim despite his health issues and family situation.

Discovering the real James Ringer along with Brandon, and Percy’s struggle for independence were the best parts of the story for me. While I felt the chemistry between both men, their declarations of love felt very premature and the quick resolution of problems and dangling loose ends left me feeling unconvinced. The Hollywood ending was rushed and overly sweet, but didn’t detract too much from my overall enjoyment of this story.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Indestructible Hulk: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Indestructible Hulk, Vol. 1: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.Indestructible Hulk, Vol. 1: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. by Mark Waid
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Bruce Banner has experienced a revelation. Banner has finally come to realize that The Hulk is incurable. Because of this revelation Banner has made a decision. Rather than spending endless amounts of time trying to cure himself, he's decided to put his mind to creating scientific breakthroughs. To do this he's made a deal with SHIELD Director Maria Hill to use Hulk as a cannon in exchange for a top notch lab and funding for his scientific research. So The Hulk has become an Agent of SHIELD.
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I have to say I love the concept going on here. Bruce Banner making a deal for both of his personalities to benefit SHIELD is brilliant and honestly it's surprising this idea has never been considered before. A lot of thought went into the story and I'm excited to see where it leads. The story is so cool that The Hulk has made friends in surprising places.
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Wednesday, May 4, 2016

BUTCH CASSIDY BY RICHARD PATTERSON

Butch Cassidy: A BiographyButch Cassidy: A Biography by Richard Patterson
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

”Was it Butch with Harry Longabaugh that night in San Vicente? As absurd as some of the claims of Butch’s reappearance seem to be, and many are indeed absurd, should the entire list of sightings be so quickly swept aside? Should we be influenced by the notion that volume dilutes? Why should multiple sightings be taken as a negative? Some of these persons---maybe even just one---could have really met him.”

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Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid were a part of our mythical heritage long before the movie starring Paul Newman and Robert Redford was released in 1969. Hollywood cast two of their biggest stars to play these charismatic outlaws. The facts about Cassidy are interesting enough, but the myths also say something about how the public perceived him.

Larger than life.

We do love our outlaws.


We sometimes attribute altruistic characteristics to them that may fall miles short of the truth. Americans especially love rooting for the guy with nothing who is willing to stand up to the banks, the robber barons, and even the government.

Butch’s real name was Robert Leroy Parker. He was born in Beaver, Utah, in 1866 to a Mormon family. Life is not fair and sooner or later all of us feel the sharp sting of disappointment when we discover that justice is not always available to us. When the powers-that-be of the Mormon religion decided to move Parker’s father off his fertile land, it might have been the first inkling that Parker had that the deck was stacked against those who don’t deal the cards.

He decided to take what he never had a chance to have.

To protect his family he began using aliases, the most famous, of course, being Butch Cassidy. He started out rustling cattle, which in this time period was the most common way for a young man to get himself in trouble. It was too easy. There were too many loose cattle around, most unbranded. The victims were large ranchers, not exactly sympathetic figures. Still, Butch got caught and sent to jail for the first and last time. When he came up for parole, he demanded to see the governor and offered him a deal. If he granted his parole, he gave his word of honor that he wouldn’t rustle cattle in Wyoming anymore. The governor might have been amused at this audacious young man; certainly he was amused enough to grant him his wish.

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The Butch Cassidy mugshot from prison that was used on his wanted posters.


Moments like this set Cassidy apart from other outlaws. He saw himself as on equal footing with those who had power, influence, and wealth. When he started robbing banks and trains, I can’t help but think that this was yet another way for him to even up the imbalance between what he didn’t have and what the rich were trying to hoard. After he had become a successful, famous train robber, he reached a point where he was tired of running and made an offer through his lawyer to the railroads to strike a deal for amnesty if he would quit holding up their trains. Unfortunately, a snow storm delayed the men who were supposed to meet with him, or Cassidy’s contribution to history might have been a footnote. After they didn’t show up, Cassidy was more determined than ever to make them pay.

It was in Fort Worth, Texas, after several weeks of literally living in a whore house, drinking, and having a good time, that Butch and the Wild Bunch decided to have their picture taken. They were swimming in cash, and they perceived themselves as successful men who wore expensive clothes. They looked dapper The photo turned out so well that the photographer put a copy in the window of his shop. It was seen by the authorities, and suddenly those line drawn sketches on their wanted posters were replaced with real photographs.

The skillet got too hot. It was time to hop out.

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Front row left to right: Harry A. Longabaugh, alias the Sundance Kid, Ben Kilpatrick, alias the Tall Texan, Robert Leroy Parker, alias Butch Cassidy; Standing: Will Carver, alias News Carver, & Harvey Logan, alias Kid Curry; Fort Worth, Texas, 1900.

It was not uncommon to hear about outlaws escaping to Mexico, but what was unusual about Butch and Harry Longabaugh (Sundance Kid) was their decision to go to South America to start fresh. I’m sure there were other American outlaws who found their way down there, but it does speak to an audacious will to leave behind everything you know and go to a foreign country. The Pinkertons were not finished with Butch, nor was Charles Siringo, who had been hired to track him down. Butch and Sundance bought a ranch and tried to go straight, but soon the authorities circled, and there were fat banks in South America, too.

They took a woman with them by the name of Etta Place (played by Katharine Ross in the movie). It isn’t her real name, but then historians haven’t been able to track down her real name or who she was beyond being, for a short time, the girlfriend of the Sundance Kid. Certainly, we can all agree that she is an intriguing, attractive young woman. ”Etta by far was the best looking of the Wild Bunch consorts; some would say even beautiful. A photograph of her and Longabaugh in 1901 shows a smallish, shapely woman with a warm, intelligent face and a quiet elegance---hardly the sort of woman who would relish the role of sidekick to a trail-hardened outlaw.”

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In the picture, you can see that there is an expensive watch pinned to her dress. Cassidy bought that watch for her from Tiffany’s in NY, shortly before they travelled to South America. There is speculation that she may have been with Butch before she was with Longabaugh. Cassidy certainly was enamored with her, maybe even a bit jealous of her exclusivity with his pal Longabaugh, or maybe she wasn’t exclusive. Later, she returns to America with Longabaugh who had some health issues; he wanted to get looked at by American doctors. He left her in San Francisco, and this intriguing woman disappeared from history.

Because we know nothing about her, we can make what we want of her.

The famous scene at the end of the movie, where it is believed that Butch and Sundance met their end in San Vicente, Bolivia, was vastly different from the truth. The real story, or something close to the truth, was that they were surrounded by government troops, but before they could be caught or gunned down, Cassidy put a bullet in the head of the wounded Sundance and then shot himself. The movie had a much more dramatic ending that left this young viewer speechless. For weeks on end, the neighborhood kids and I played out that final scene over and over again. Needless to say, I’ve been acquainted with the mythology of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid for a long time. Those names were made for newspaper headlines.

The question remains, were those two men Butch Cassidy and Harry Longabaugh?

Richard Patterson has done a meticulous job of detailing everything that is known about Cassidy and even noting those stories that may venture into the area of might have happened. He debunks those stories that just don’t make sense with what is known to be true. As Butch became famous, robberies that could not have been perpetrated by him were attributed to him. If you are a member of a train crew that got robbed, isn’t it a much better story to say you were robbed by the Wild Bunch than Ted, Fred, and Puck?

There is one great story about a bank that was robbed in Winnemucca, Nevada. There were rumors that the head cashier, George S. Nixon, was involved in that robbery and that Butch Cassidy had nothing to do with the robbery, despite a tentative identification from Nixon. Later when Nixon suddenly acquired wealth and established his own bank, those rumors started to sound like more than just rumors. Cassidy’s success at robbery might have created a piggyback crime opportunity for one head cashier, who in his own fashion stole from the rich to give to the poor...well...himself.

The real question is, if Butch Cassidy died in San Vicente, then why did people keep reporting that they had seen him, talked to him, and not just friends, but family as well? One explanation is that people wanted to believe he’d escaped somehow. Like with rabid fans of Elvis, their need to believe outweighed the need for facts. Another problem might have to do with a guy by the name of William Phillips.

He believed he was Butch Cassidy.

”Since we can assume that William Phillips was not Butch Cassidy, one wonders what effect Phillip’s activities had on the theory that Butch survived the San Vicente shootout and returned to the United States. Jim Dullenty believes that the effect was significant, suggesting that most of the sightings of Butch were probably sightings of Phillips.”

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William T. Phillips

Phillips actually traveled all over the West and seemed to enjoy those moments when he ran into someone connected to Cassidy. He had a passing resemblance. Anyone who goes back for a class reunion can testify to how significantly people change in appearance over time. There are things that don’t change, like the eyes, and when I look into the eyes of Phillips, I can actually believe he is Cassidy.

To further complicate things, a team, in recent years, dug for the bodies that were buried at San Vicente and found bone fragments, but none of them matched the DNA of Cassidy or Longabaugh.

Butch proves as difficult to catch in death as he was when he was alive.


I can make myself believe either way. There is a part of me that really wants him to not be the guy at San Vicente, but there is also a part of me that believes it probably was. Just as I convince myself of this, I wake up in the middle of the night, puzzling over their inability to find the bodies. There is certainly enough doubt to keep speculations alive.

It would be just like Butch Cassidy to have a good laugh about this golden opportunity to get his life back. He’d raise a glass to the poor bastards who got shot. He’d get a job, honest work, and ever so often he’d take a gander at the local bank and think about what it would take to liberate that money, hidden away from the people who need it most.

The Pinkertons never did close his file.

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Tuesday, May 3, 2016

The Emperor's Railroad (Dreaming Cities, #1) By Guy Haley

The Emperor's Railroad (Dreaming Cities, #1)The Emperor's Railroad by Guy Haley
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This was absolutely stellar, I think I have offically changed my mind about novellas, This one is loaded down with a great post apocalyptic, dystopian world . Engaging characters, and strangely to me, a British author who does southern characters well.

Scifi, fantasy, horror all smashed into a 100 plus page package, read this one, you won't regret it.

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I Am Slaughter (The Beast Arises #1) by Dan Abnett

I Am SlaughterI Am Slaughter by Dan Abnett
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Warhammer is like man brain candy to me, you know there will be explosions, and men like gods doing ungodly things to millions upon millions of aliens and other men who deserve it.

That being said, The Black Library has made a bit of a ballsy move by spreading out what is essentially one giant story over 12 books over a year. Because you never know what quality you will get from start to finish, however, Mr. Abnett starts the blood flowing in grand fashion.

Is it groundbreaking stuff? nope.. it is however lots of fun if you are a fan of the WH40k universe.



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